on breaking down clean beauty.

It’s the season of new routines, and that includes your skincare!

As much fun as it is, shopping for skincare can be exhausting. And no, it’s not because I could spend hours in Sephora. Analyzing every product we buy to ensure it’s good for us can be such a process that it takes away from the joy of it all when we’re not completely in the know of what to look for and what to avoid. New ingredients and technologies and trends are constantly emerging, and while this can be exciting for beauty lovers, it can also be overwhelming. With so many unfamiliar terms on product labels, it can be difficult to know which products are truly safe and effective for your skin - as well as your overall health.

It’s the season of new routines and refreshing your vibe. To help you navigate the beauty aisle with confidence, and your beauty b.f.f. (me) in your pocket, I’ve outlined some must-know beauty buzzwords to look for the next time you’re shopping or auditing your skincare shelf for fall — and beyond!

Clean Shopping 101 - Ingredients To Love

1. Hyaluronic Acid: This ingredient draws moisture to the skin, keeping it plump and hydrated. It's suitable for all skin types, and is especially beneficial for those with dry or dehydrated skin (yes, there’s a difference). You’ll see this ingredient often, but ensure a standalone HA product isn’t using a ton of water or similar fillers, while claiming to be a concentrated product.

2. Ceramides: Ceramides make up a significant part of your skin barrier. They help to keep moisture in and irritants out. Look for products containing ceramides if you have dry, sensitive, or compromised skin.

3. Niacinamide: A form of vitamin B3, niacinamide offers a variety of benefits for the skin. It can help to minimize pores, reduce redness and hyperpigmentation, and improve skin texture. You will often find it in serums, moisturizers, and toners!

4. Peptides: This is a huge buzzword right now, so it’s good to understand it. Peptides are short chains of amino acids that act as messengers in the skin. They can stimulate collagen production, reduce wrinkles, and improve skin firmness. Peptides are often found in anti-aging products, as well as brighteners.

5. Prebiotics and Probiotics: The microbiome on your skin is a community of bacteria that lives there. Prebiotics and probiotics help to nourish and balance the microbiome, which can lead to healthier, more resilient skin. My rule of thumb is balancing using these effectively, without overusing them either which can cause more problems than they help (in that case).

6. Chemical Exfoliants: NOTE: BE CAREFUL AND USE DISCRETIONALLY! Chemical exfoliants use acids to remove dead skin cells from the surface of the skin. They can be effective in brightening the complexion, smoothing rough texture, and minimizing pores. However, it's important to choose the right acid for your skin type and use it correctly to avoid irritation. Popular chemical exfoliants include alpha hydroxy acids (AHAs) like glycolic acid and lactic acid, and beta hydroxy acids (BHAs) like salicylic acid. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT overuse these, use them on freshly treated skin, or combine them where possible.

7. Centella Asiatica (Cica): Cica is a popular K-beauty skincare ingredient that has been shown to promote healing, soothe inflammation, and reduce redness. It's a great choice for those with sensitive or acne-prone skin. Using Cica can help calm your skin while restoring and strengthening the skin barrier.

8. Vitamin C: Vitamin C is one of my favourite ingredients, as it’s is a powerful antioxidant that helps to protect the skin from damage (see: free radicals being tyrants). It can also brighten the complexion and fade hyperpigmentation and scarring. Look for products containing stabilized vitamin C for maximum effectiveness. Similar to HA, ensure your products are free of fillers so that you get the full effects!

9. Retinol: Retinol is a derivative of vitamin A that is a proven anti-aging ingredient, and anti-acne assistant. It can stimulate collagen production, reduce wrinkles, and improve skin texture. However, retinol can be irritating to some skin types, so it's important to start slowly and increase usage gradually.

10. SPF: No matter what your skin concerns are, sun protection is essential. Every day. Look for a broad-spectrum sunscreen with SPF 50 or higher and apply it generously every day. Did I say every day? Sunscreen is available in a variety of formulations, including lotions, creams, gels, sprays, and even makeup!

By familiarizing yourself with these key beauty buzzwords, you'll be better equipped to understand what you’re putting on your skin, and choose safe and effective products that meet your individual skincare needs. Remember, it's always a good idea to do your research and consult with a dermatologist if you have any concerns.

Additional Tips for Choosing Skincare Products

• Read the ingredient list carefully: Pay attention to the order of ingredients, as the higher up an ingredient is listed, the more concentrated it is in the product.

• Patch test new products: Before applying a new product to your entire face, test it on a small patch of skin to check for any allergic reactions or irritation.

• Go waterless: Water-based products are often packed with fillers like water, which can dilute the active ingredients and reduce their effectiveness. Opt for products that provide long-lasting hydration and a luxurious feel, without all the unnecessary fillers.

• Learn + consider your skin type: Choose products that are formulated for your specific skin type, whether it's dry, oily, combination, or sensitive.

• Look for products with clean ingredients: While synthetic ingredients can be ‘effective’, the long term health effects are sky high. Many people prefer to use products that contain clean and natural, ethically-sourced ingredients.

• Avoid products with harsh chemicals: Chemicals, such as parabens, sulfates, and phthalates, can be irritating to the skin. Look for products that are free of these ingredients and your body will feel the difference.

• Pay attention to expiration dates: Skincare products can lose their potency over time. Check the expiration date on the product before purchasing it!

By incorporating these factors into your new and improved skincare routine, you can achieve skin that you feel your best in.

Questions? Send me a message!

—

A

on what could have been.

“You were bigger than the whole sky. You were more than just a short time.”

I haven’t even started writing yet and I’m teary eyed. So you know where this one is going, my friends.

I don’t even like T*yl-r Sw-ft okay? But Bigger Than the Whole Sky was on repeat for that entire day. The day that shook me more than I care to admit.

But he’ll never read this, so we’re in a safe space.

I’m ready to talk about New York.

—

It took me three-and-a-half hours to stop crying. I cried the second I woke up. I cried as we carted my things to the car. As we approached the airport air struggled out of my lungs. For the first time, I was speechless and in tears — in front of the person I care for, let alone a MAN.

It’s important to understand here that I don’t cry in front of others. It’s something that I’ve always done since I was quite little. But especially as I’ve grown up… I’ve never let someone know, to their face, that they’ve broken me. This was so new to me. And yet, I effortlessly sobbed as he held me, time and again.

At first, I debated staying sat in the passenger’s seat. Sick to my stomach and full of grief.

I'm never gonna meet

What could've been, would've been.

I couldn’t look at him. I was leaving. I was leaving and everything was so unfinished. We were unfinished. We are.

But some unknown force to me carried me out and onto the curb. The sun was perfectly falling on us. Drying the salt stains that dotted my cheeks.

“Do you have everything?” and small-talk fills the heavy space between us.

“No.” Because we both know I don’t. I can’t. Find. Words. Everything cues a river of tears I can’t stop. But I surprise myself.

“Will you miss me?” A question I’m infamous for. I manage a half smile. We kiss, but it’s different. It feels final. I think we both felt it. I can feel hyperventilation kick in and wave myself away.

Leave it to me to collapse no more than five steps into the airport in tears. I pretend to re-pack my things, but I’m trying to gather more than some clothes. Sympathetic airline check-in staff don’t even bother me with my overweight bag. They had just watched me fall apart, and probably assume it’s better not to nudge me before I break (again).

I cried through security, which prompted a few extra checks and stern looks. I tearfully sat in the lounge waiting for my flight and connecting back to the reality I left. I just wanted to be back home, in my bed, under every blanket I owned.

When I finally parked myself on the flight home, I really let it out. For so many stares that I rendered unimportant. In this moment, I just needed to feel everything. The flight attendant brought me a filled-to-the-brim glass of white wine, unprovoked. Mind you, this airline is known for being stingy with alcohol - so she knew I was in my feelings. Something that simultaneously made me giggle and cry more.

What should've been you.

What could've been, would've been you.

—

I’ve spent most of this diary writing about leaving. But you’re probably wondering, what happened during?

I could say love, but maybe he would disagree. He shows me a city I had never been to, but had quickly fallen for. And I mean, really shows it to me. He shows himself, to me, too. We eat the most delicious foods. He takes me to places that mean something to him, and shows me milestones of his life in a place otherwise unknown to me. It now feels familiar. Warm. He does too. Home.

He shows me parts of himself he says others don’t see. His home. His life. His day-to-day. Something that has grown to feel a part of my own life, too. I can put places to things we’ve only talked about, and faces to names. The pieces feel like they fit. Well.

I am swirling in a place I am sure I will come to call home too. Nothing felt wrong. In my last days in a city I can’t find reasons to get sick of, though, I growingly feel nauseous.

We talk about why it can’t work. Why it’s nonsensical. Why it’s better to just remain as it was.

But nothing ever really goes back to what it was, does it?

And we’ll never talk about that because it’s easier not to, right? To pretend like it’s normal to go from consistent conversation to saying hello once in a fortnight. To go from sharing everything about and to each other, to talking about the weather. To go from deep belly laughter and lingering kisses to shutting each other out.

Did some bird flap its wings over in Asia?

Did some force take you because I didn't pray?

Five days. Five days to go from a perfectly sound foundation to shaky, at best.

Everything I felt was deep in my soul. Electric. But it was his smile that truly captivated me. Mysterious. Charming. Simply irresistible. I want to keep it for myself. For good. But you can’t hold what doesn’t want to be held, can you?

The intensity paired well against the city’s sleepless energy. Every moment. With this feeling came the complexity and challenges of nurturing a relationship in a generation that can’t seem to house it. Our differences. The chaos of our individual lives.

It’s too much, for him. I thought this would look like learning about each other and growing together. He contrasts.

—

I can sit here and wonder what changed but what will that do for anyone? For us? As I reflect on the absolute whirlwind of emotions and events that have shaped the past few months, I find myself at a loss for words. Again, shocking right?

But I feel compelled to share this chapter because if you’re reading this, you’ve likely been a part of it in some way. You know that New York stole my heart and holds it, and that taking chances is better than wondering forever what could have been.

Whether our love story is destined to be a fleeting chapter or a lifelong journey, it has forever changed me. It reminds me to embrace the unpredictable, to find beauty everywhere, and to love with all my heart no matter what. That magic can happen when two paths cross at just the right moment. That it can happy anywhere. That it can be anything.

I am grateful for every moment, every lesson, and every emotion that New York has brought into my life.

In all its glory and madness, New York City became a metaphor for our love - beautiful and unpredictable, but worthy of adoration nonetheless.

—

A

on 23 things I learned in 2023.

“My resolution is to stop wondering if I’m good enough for people and start wondering if they’re good enough for me.”

You should know that this piece started with ‘What Was I Made For? // Billie Eilish’ coming on shuffle and me crying. But what doesn’t start with me crying?

ANYway. Reflections have a tendency to do that to me. I am someone who feels everything very deeply at any given moment. Sadness, anger, empathy, excitement, love. Any and all of it - I’m at 120% when most people are at 50%. It’s something I’m learning to relax on, but also, isn’t that kind of wonderful in some ways? I’m trying to figure that out, but I hope so.

2023 was a lot. I think we can all honestly say that. But there was good interwoven that opened the door for a lot of learning, self honesty, and growth ultimately as we move into a new year.

Here’s what I learned in 2023:

1. Taking care of your health and wellness is your greatest gift to yourself.

2. We have a finite time with everyone in our lives. Cherish that in how you move through your relationships. Love your people so loudly.

3. Every loss is a lesson. Take time to reflect on them and grow from them.

4. Just because you have someone’s best interests at heart, doesn’t mean that they have the same for you.

5. Your gut health affects every. other. part. of your body. Check in with it!

6. If your job (or anything tbh) is making you depressed, anxious or draining you overall - it’s not the job for you. Find what inspires you… money comes and goes either way.

7. People who truly love you will never try to change you.

8. In many ways, life is an intricate dance. Watch how those around you move and match accordingly.

9. Matte nails absorb EVERYTHING. Don’t do it!

10. If you have an appointment for 9 AM, plan for it as if it’s at 8:30. Getting there early means you’re ready to go AND you have time to scroll TikTok.

11. Once you start incorporating healthier practices into your life, it becomes as routine as breathing. Please don’t make excuses to block a better you. This includes boundaries and staying firm with them.

12. Stop wondering if you’re good enough. Start wondering if others deserve you.

13. You CANNOT do everything yourself. Starting a business is not easy. You’re hustling - don’t let anyone downplay that. Also keep track of everything and hire PROFESSIONALS to help you!

14. Spending quality time with your loved ones will refuel you in ways that nothing else can.

15. Learn your love languages. Watch your relationships change.

16. Nothing in our universe is a coincidence. Read Signs by Laura Lynne Jackson. Also, pay more attention to your life lol.

17. Have the cookie. Buy the shoes. Take the trip. You can’t with 100% certainty say you’ll be able to do it another time.

18. Learn to trust natural medicine and movement therapy as much as you trust pharmaceuticals and your GP. They all go hand in hand for painting a better picture of your body.

19. USE YOUR TIME OFF!!!!!!!

20. Cold therapy is ssssoooooooo good for you but also SO FUN.

21. Make time for self-care days. Whatever they might look like, a spa or a single service or a whole event with friends. Do it.

22. Take a solo trip. You never know what you might learn about yourself.

23. Be kind. Create a better world. We all need this.

—

A

on a winter giveaway.

enter the winter wellness giveaway on our instagram page - @yourmorningmeditation.

as the chilly winter months approach, there's no better time to prioritize your well-being and find inner peace. that's why Your Morning Meditation is excited to announce the Winter Wellness Giveaway! I believe that taking a few moments each day for mindfulness can make a world of difference in your overall health and happiness. join the community in this season of self-care and enter this giveaway for a chance to win fantastic prizes that will help you embrace the winter with a warm heart and a clear mind.

ENTER HERE

follow the instructions on our pinned post to enter!

BONUS: subscribe to the newsletter at the bottom of this page for extra entries.

share the giveaway on your social media profiles for additional entries and to spread the love of wellness with your friends and family.

winter can be a challenging season for many, with shorter days and colder temperatures affecting our mood and energy levels. however, it's also a time of introspection and renewal. by incorporating wellness into your daily routine, you can:

• reduce stress and anxiety

• improve your sleep quality

• boost your immune system

• enhance your mental clarity and focus

• cultivate a sense of gratitude and inner peace

and I’m here to support you on this journey towards better, more accessible wellness.

ENTER HERE

remember, the power to transform your winter into a season of well-being is within your grasp. enter now and take the first step towards a happier, healthier you!

let's make this winter your best one yet. good luck!

—

A

on gratitude (journaling).

For all the thoughts we cannot tame and the dreams we want to bring to life.

In the age of digital detoxes and mindfulness mantras, one old-school practice has been steadily gaining popularity: gratitude journaling. It's more than just a fleeting trend; this simple act can bring about profound changes in our emotional and mental well-being. But how does putting pen to paper translate to a happier mind? Let's delve into the benefits of gratitude journaling and provide some actionable tips to get immersed in this rewarding practice.

What is Gratitude Journaling?

Gratitude journaling is the practice of regularly recording the things for which we are thankful. This can be done daily, weekly, or even sporadically, but the essence remains the same – focusing on the positive aspects and blessings in life, big or small.

The Benefits

Enhances Positivity

Consistently counting our blessings helps rewire our brain to focus more on positive experiences, making us naturally more optimistic. Over time, this can contribute to a brighter outlook on life, even in challenging circumstances.

Reduces Stress and Anxiety

By focusing on the good in life, we can distance ourselves from negative thoughts, reducing the harmful effects of stress and anxiety. Recognizing and appreciating life's little moments brings a sense of contentment that can counterbalance daily worries.

Boosts Self-awareness and Personal Growth

Taking the time to reflect on what we are thankful for helps us understand what truly matters to us. This introspective habit fosters personal growth and paves the way for more intentional living.

Tips for Beginners

Start Simple

You don't need a fancy journal or an elaborate setup. A simple notebook and pen will do. The key is consistency and sincerity in your entries.

Set a Routine

Whether it's every morning as you sip your coffee or every night before bed, setting a regular time can help establish the habit.

Quantity Over Quality

Your entries don't have to be deep or profound every time. Some days it might just be "thankful for the warm sun" or "grateful for a good book." It's the act of recognizing these moments that matters.

Review Periodically

Every month, review your entries. This reflection not only reinforces the positive feelings but also lets you see how far you've come and the good that's unfolded over time.

Challenges

Like any new habit, journaling can sometimes feel challenging to keep up with. On days you feel uninspired or down, it might seem hard to find things to be grateful for. My blog is a perfect example of this, LOL! Remember, it's okay to have these moments. They're a part of the journey. When facing such days:

Look to the Little Things: Sometimes, the smallest things can bring the most joy.

Avoid the Pressure: Your journal is personal. Don’t pressure yourself to always find something profound. It's your authentic feelings that count.

Take a Break: If you really can’t muster the energy, give yourself permission to skip a day. The aim is to make this a rewarding practice, not a burdensome chore.

Making Gratitude Journaling a Lifelong Practice

To truly reap the benefits of gratitude journaling, consider making it a lifelong habit. Like any skill, the more you practice, the more natural it becomes. Over time, you'll find that the act of seeking out positive moments becomes second nature, creating a ripple effect of positivity in other areas of your life.

In a world where we're often bombarded with negative news and stressors, journaling stands as a beacon of positivity. It’s a gentle reminder that amidst the chaos, there's always something to be thankful for. Whether you're new to the practice or have been journaling for years, there's always room to grow and benefits to reap. So grab that pen, open up your journal, and let the gratitude flow babe.

—

A

on being mindful.

Mindful ≠ being caught in the chaos of thoughts we have, btw.

In a world perpetually spinning with the chaotic buzz of existence, seeking a place for yourself that is calm is essential. This starts with what’s in your mind. Diving into realms of meditation, the intricacies of our mental health, and embracing the ethereal concept of mindfulness are three key areas to carve out and really understand to get a grasp on ourselves.

Grounding down in Meditation.

Meditation, is probably the most introspective, intimate experience of self exploration. It’s a timeless practice that dates back thousands of years. Its ancient wisdom, safeguarded and carried forward over time by its most sacred practitioners, has surged in contemporary times as a luminous guiding star for those seeking refuge from the chaos that surrounds us. This is particularly seen at events like yoga classes, breathwork workshops and the like. But what does authentic meditation look like, on a 1:1 level?

Imagine a hidden space in your mind, just for you. Meditation grants us the key to this inner sanctuary, where the boundaries between self and universe blur. There’s no chaos. There’s no drama. It’s you and your soul, finding balance.

In meditation, we unburden ourselves from the weight of our own expectations and judgments. We allow ourselves the space and peace to confront our being.

Existence, in itself, is exhausting.

We become observers of our thoughts and can more easily guide them to their resting place; like a spiritual filing cabinet. Here, amidst the stillness, we rediscover our true selves—serene, boundless, and interconnected with the cosmos. It allows us a quiet place to rebalance. Allowing yourself even 10 minutes here each day can be life-changing.

Minding our Mental

Mental health and managing it demands our compassion and understanding; for the self, and as a community. Our minds, souls and bodies require nurturing and care, just like anything else we tend to. Would a garden grow if we didn’t water it?

Picture the mind as a garden, where emotions bloom like vibrant flowers, and thoughts are the roots that anchor our existence. Tending to it, consistently, is a testament to our strength and resilience.

Don’t forget that your body and mind are intricately intertwined, and they function in reflection of the other.

When we prioritize mental health, we prioritize ourselves as a whole.

In the same metaphor of the garden, we need to be nurturing the soil, removing weeds of negativity, and allowing the blossoms of positivity and self-love to flourish. Our mental health is as fragile as a garden, and it doesn’t take much to destabilize it. The better the foundation, the better we thrive.

The Mindfulness Piece

Keeping mindful keeps us completely open and aware. Mindfulness invites us to immerse ourselves in the present moment. It’s the art of being fully alive and savouring life. In our relentless and impatient pursuit of tomorrow, we often overlook what’s happening right in front of us, today.

The practice of mindfulness encourages us to embrace each moment with focus and presence. It’s the bridge that connects our wandering minds with the beauty that surrounds us. With mindfulness, we become attuned to the symphony of life—the rustle of leaves in the breeze, the laughter of a loved one, the fragrance of our person—each exemplifying the joys of our existence. Sometimes, this can be a huge anchor to grip on to when we’re feeling at our lowest.

Mindfulness transforms the mundane into the extraordinary, inviting us to see the world with fresh eyes and an open heart.

It’s a gentle reminder that life is not a destination but a journey—where each step is a celebration.

Will it always feel this way? Nope. But we can practice this as often as possible to try and create an imbalance (for once) where there is more joy to experience than struggles.

Finding Peace in our Problems

Meditation, mental health, and mindfulness are our catalysts for personal transformation.

Meditation empowers us to break free from anxiety and stress, allowing us to approach challenges with a calm and focused mind. It fosters resilience, nurturing the roots of our inner strength.

Mental health, when challenged and embraced, becomes the cornerstone of our well-being as a whole. It enables us to confront our inner demons with courage and compassion, fostering self-acceptance and healing. We replace darkness with light.

Mindfulness allows us to see the world differently. We strive to connect with others on a deeper level, with empathy, understanding, and hope.

As we reflect upon the connectivity of these keys, we realize that this journey is not solitary but collective. We are all interconnected, our stories interwoven. Our experiences, our struggles, and our wins resonate together. We find solace in knowing that countless souls across time have fought for the same sense of serenity. We discover that vulnerability is a universal language that we all speak, fluently. The struggles we face are not unique to us alone; they are threads that bind us to others in empathy and understanding. We find a common ground where the beauty of existence is celebrated together.

In a world that frequently demands more than it gives, meditation, mental health, and mindfulness stand as beacons of faith.

As you continue your journey, remember to pause, to meditate, to nurture your mental health, and to practice mindfulness. In these moments, you will not only discover yourself but also a world enriched with possibilities.

Embrace this journey with a receptive spiri. In the gentle embrace of meditation, the nurturing care of mental health, and the profound practice of mindfulness, you will find not only inner peace but also a deeper connection to the world around you. Ground yourself deeper.

There are things to look forward to. I promise.

—

A

on gut checks.

We are too young to be this tired, sick and sad.

It’s time for a GUT CHECK on Gut Health - inspired by me spending the last week in gut hell. This, from someone who is on top of her probiotic game!

I’m sure some of you have heard the gut referred to as the ‘second brain’, because it’s so deeply connected to our nervous systems and affects our mood, emotions, activity, and behavior — truly, everything. Your gut also contributes heftily to the microbiome, which is our do or die when it comes to immunity, metabolism, digestion, and our holistic wellness from a 360 perspective.

When our guts (ha) are out of whack, problems come into play, like inflammation, pain, bloating, gas, diarrhea, constipation, nausea, fatigue, anxiety, depression, brain fog, and everything in between.

It also increases our risks of developing chronic diseases like diabetes, obesity, heart disease, cancer, and autoimmune disorders. Big nope energy.

That’s why it’s so important to take care of our gut health and keep it in optimal condition! Like a fine tuned machine.

• Eating a balanced diet rich in fiber, probiotics, prebiotics, and fermented foods is SO key. You can have your snacks and your weaknesses, but everything in moderations babes.

• Avoiding processed foods, sugar, alcohol, caffeine, and antibiotics - I’m addicted truly to my morning coffee, but this has been a major wake up call for me on exploring my energy at all points so I can ween myself off and get back on track.

• HYDRATE! Drinking plenty of water is NOT optional.

• Get stress low and dopamine high.

• Sleep hygiene - YOU NEED YOUR REST! Know when to take a step back and take that mid-afternoon nap.

• Get moving by exercising regularly to get your body moving and evaluate taking supplements to make sure all of your systems are good and green.

It’s important to note, though, like I led with… that sometimes, even if you do all those things, your gut can still want to fight back. Food poisoning, infection, allergy, intolerance, medication side effects, or simply eating something that doesn’t agree with you. These can disrupt the balance and make it hard to get back on track or feeling well.

That’s what has been happening with me - with a triggered nasty reaction in my gut. It’s kept me off work periodically, glued to my bed, been painful, embarrassing, and frankly exhausting. Our bodies have enough to do each day without having to constantly reset each area.

It reminded me that I need to pay more attention to my gut health and overall wellness, even more than usual. I need to be more mindful of what I eat and how I eat. I need to listen to my body and what it needs - not just when I’m running on empty.

So that’s what I’m doing right now. I’m following some simple tips to boost my gut health and wellness, and wanted to share them in case you’re going through the same thing or want to prevent it from happening. Of course, never meant to replace medical advice or treatment but rather complement them. It’s always good to be braced with knowledge!

Thank you for reading this and taking time for your wellness. We’ll chat more wellness foods soon, when I don’t get triple nauseous even thinking of it (haha).

Stay well,

—

A

on falling in love with the moon.

“Do not swear by the moon, for she changes constantly. Then your love would also change.”

Oh we’re doing this? Okay. Deep breaths.

I’m sure for those of you who asked and dove deeply into my post on being lost, you’re wondering what happened next.

How does it end? Does it? Does he get the girl? The true plot twist is he has her heart on a silver chain. The chain is tight, but fits. It can choke. It can be painful. It can fit beautifully, too. Duality. Two things can be true at once.

Let your soul wander – get as lost as you damn well please.

But, let me not get ahead of myself. If you’re not caught up, go back and get the full story. The fairy tale, but the original fairy tales where it’s just a cruel lesson on life. For the better?

In respect of the fact that this isn’t only my story, and in some aspects not mine to tell in entirety, I’ll tell this story in metaphors. But if you read closely, my hope is that you’ll understand every word. We love a strong communicator.

—

I loved the moon from the first time I saw him. Been in awe of him, really, in his beauty and mystery. I felt a connection with him that I could never explain — and I’m rarely at a loss for words. They say the moon's gravitational pull is the main cause of the rise and fall of ocean tides. It causes unease in the sea, causing ocean waters that face the moon to pull at its strongest. Loving the moon is not easy.

The moon is not always bright and full as we dreamily expect it to be. And that’s not really fair, is it? To expect the moon to always be bright and on its best, for us. Sometimes, it’s dark. It hides. It wanes and cannot be what we need it to be, all the time. Sometimes, it goes dark entirely. Sometimes, we lose its pull and can’t find it. We get lost, in the darkness, together.

But just as often, the moon is waxing. It gathers light on its journey of becoming new and full again. I love being a part of every phase.

I often wonder, is the moon meant to be loved from afar? Are we supposed to look, but never touch? And is it because that’s what is safe, versus what is meant to be? I’ve always been one to walk the line in limbo. Between extremes, stumbling. I’ve often been drawn to the longer, darker, tougher routes. But isn’t this all the more satisfying, in the end?

What I find most lovable about the moon is that it follows a cycle that only he knows. In loving the moon, you never know what to expect. You never know when he will be happy or sad, calm or anxious, stable or unstable. You never know when he will shine or fade, rise or set, appear or disappear.

But you love him anyway, at all of his phases. You love him because he is beautiful in his own way. You love him because he has a soul that touches yours. You love him because he is more than his phases. He is more than the moon.

I fell in love with the moon. I entered at his brightest phase. He lit my world up with his words, charisma, and outlook on life. I think the moon fell in love with me too, because I was gentle in how I explored his complexities. I would do anything for him, and he knows.

Loving the moon is not easy, but it is so worth it. The moon teaches you so many beautiful, albeit sometimes tough lessons. He teaches you patience, compassion, empathy, and resilience. He teaches you how to appreciate the good moments and cope — together — with the bad ones. He teaches you how to love unconditionally and wholeheartedly, and how much you deserve that.

Challenging, but rewarding. Painful, but healing. Scary, but exciting. It is a journey that you take together, through the highs and lows, through the light and darkness, through the phases of the moon.

Loving the moon is not easy, but it’s so beautiful. The moon has a magic that no other celestial body can rival for you.

Loving the moon is a bond that you nurture and strengthen, in sync with your sun. Remember though, that it can only be done harmoniously together. There is no moon as we know it best, without the sun.

I have always loved the moon from the first moment, and I always will.

Now you know. I hope this helps you heal from or with your moon, too. I feel lucky to experience such a thing, and I hope you do. More on healing, soon.

With love,

—

A

on loving our bodies.

Because life is truly too short to hate the skin we’re in.

I have suffered since I was about 14 (if not younger, but this is when it was caught) from PCOS and all of its nightmares. What’s PCOS? Simply put, a hormonal disorder that affects the ovaries and causes a lot of symptoms that impact my body and my self-image - cataclysmically. If you’ve lived with it, you know. If you haven’t, I want to share with you my journey of learning to love and accept my body, despite the challenges that PCOS brings. I hope that by sharing my story, I can inspire and empower others who are going through similar struggles — whether PCOS-specific or not. Because at the end of the day, I want us all to feel like we can love our bodies no matter what.

No matter what.

Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) affects about 10% of women, especially in recent generations. It causes irregular periods, excess hair growth, acne, weight gain, infertility, and other problems that I otherwise didn’t experience prior to my symptom development. PCOS also increases the risk of developing a library of diseases like type 2 diabetes, heart disease, depression, and anxiety… just to name a few.

How do you get it? No one knows, really. There are fingers pointed at birth control methods, lifestyle flags, and just existing (ha). But I have to believe it’s so much more than that, that we simply are just still discovering. I was a high-level athlete doing more cross-training than you could probably imagine to look at me. There wasn’t a sport I didn’t do. I eat like a bird, to this day. I’m as on top of my wellness as one could be. Do I look it? Frankly, no.

But the truth is, that aspect doesn’t matter as much as owning the bodies we are given, no matter the wars they fight.

I have to believe that the universe blessed me with my curves in all of the places they fall, and that I look absolutely fine the way that I am. I’ve spent too much time confused and scared based on how my body feels, and feeling like something is wrong with me. For a long time, I didn’t understand why my body was behaving this way, and I often felt ashamed of how I look. The girl who never had a pimple developed acne and rosacea, thicker hair, and a belly that won’t budge no matter how much I exercise or diet. I often feel like I don’t fit in with the beauty standards that society and media impose on us. Like I’m not feminine enough, or attractive enough, or worthy enough.

It wasn’t until I tuned into body positivity that I started to change my perspective on my body and myself, promoting the acceptance of all bodies, regardless of size, shape, skin tone, gender, and abilities. It challenges the unrealistic and harmful beauty standards that society and popular culture create, and it celebrates the diversity and beauty of the body. It also encourages people to have a healthy relationship with their bodies, by focusing on their mindfulness, wellness and self-care.

Beauty is not defined by a number on a scale or a size on a label. It’s not something that can be measured or judged by others. If you learn one thing from reading this, please embrace your body as it is, with all its flaws and strengths. There are no number of surgeries, crash diets or photo-editing tutorials that will change your vision of yourself — only YOU can change that.

• You have to love and accept your body as it is. I stopped comparing myself to others or trying to fit into a mold that was not made for me, particularly as a BIPOC. Appreciate what your body can do for you, such as breathing, moving, feeling, healing, and creating.

• Take care of your body in ways that make you feel good. Eat nutritious foods, exercise regularly, sleep!!!, meditate daily… make your own list of care chronicles. I started to express myself in ways that made me feel happy, ultimately.

I’m not saying that it’s easy or perfect. It’s a journey that has its ups and downs. There are days when I still struggle with my symptoms or feel insecure about my appearance. Hell, it’s MOST days. There are times when I still face discrimination or stigma because of my condition or identity or through people’s assumptions, too. But loving my body and my SELF more, helps me cope with these challenges and reminds me of my worth and power.

If you are someone who struggles deeply with your body image or self-esteem, I hope that you can find some comfort and inspiration in this post. You are not alone in this journey. You are not defined by your fears. You are beautiful and valuable just as you are. You deserve to love and be loved by yourself and others. You have the right to live your life fully and authentically.

Let’s spread the sentiment of loving our bodies and supporting each other in our journeys. If you felt this, please share with people you know could use these words today.

Stay positive, healthy and radiant and don’t ever let your light go out.

With love,

—

A